Do you feel like other people are constantly judging you? They’re judging what you so, say and the way you look? At some point in our life, we’ve all been affected by what others have said or what we think they’ve said.
Not only does this affect the way we see ourselves, but it also affects the way we operate in our business. In this post, I will share with you some concrete steps that I have used to help me and I know will help you to get over the fear of being judged by others so you can share your amazing products and services with those who really need them.
How To Get Over Your Fear Of Being Judged By Others
Resist The Urge To Allow Other People To Define Who You Are
When I first started making videos, the very idea of appearing on camera terrified me. Why? Because I was genuinely afraid of what others would think and couldn’t stop worrying about what other people would say.
So for months on end, I’d panic whenever it came time to make these videos. If a hair was out of place or my outfit was “off”, I didn’t want to do it. What if everyone hated what I wore or what I looked like? How could I show my imperfect face and possibly make a fool of myself?
Other people’s opinions (or their potential opinions) soon got the best of me. Over time though, I came to a realization. People will always have their opinions and whether good or bad, I couldn’t let them define who I was.
Yes, they might like me or no they might hate me, but at the end of the day people’s words are just that; they are words. They are opinions, not fact. Plus if I spend my life trying to please everyone out of fear of being judged by them then I will never be happy.
I also had to sit down and have an honest conversation with myself and soon understood that the reason I was so afraid of other people’s opinions was that deep down I didn’t feel good about myself.
Once I came to that realization I slowly stopped caring about being criticised because I knew what areas I needed to work on within myself and got to work on them.
Realize That The Negative Comments People Make Are About Them Not You
I’m sure at some point in your life you’ve met someone you couldn’t please. No matter what you did or how well you did it, they would always find something to say about it.
“You didn’t speak loud enough” or “Your lighting wasn’t bright enough” they might say. I’ve had my fair share of meeting with these kinds of negative people and it’s brought me to this conclusion: A lot of the bad/negative things that others might say about you is really a reflection on them, not you, and that speaks volumes.
When people hear you speak and comment about your “funny accent”, they themselves might be struggling with a quote-unquote funny accent of their own. If someone watches you at a networking event then proceeds to point out everything you did wrong, they could be criticising their own areas of lack.
The point is that people who normally give you the hardest time tend to be living hard lives too. Think about it. If you are a truly happy person with a booming business/life then why focus on being negative all the time?
A person’s negative words of judgement are a direct reflection on them, not you and the more you understand this the less scary their words become.
Remember That You Have One Life To Live
In a few months, I’m going to be thirty and thought this milestone might not mean much to some it is such a big achievement for me. Each day when I wake up and have the chance to do something new, I’m reminded that this is my one life and I don’t get a do-over.
Many of us live our entire lives hiding away out of fear of being judged or criticised by people who really don’t understand us without ever realizing this fact.
We all have one life to live on this earth and that means that we should try to live our very best life and take all the chances we can. Every minute we spend being overwhelmed by our fear of what others might think of us is one less moment we have to do something truly memorable.
Being liked by other people is an awesome feeling but it should never take priority over us doing the best we can to positively impact as many as we can while we can.
You just started your business (or have been in business for a while) right? Yet the thought of outsiders not liking your passions or your business is keeping you locked inside your mind, unable to go out there and be seen.
This shouldn’t be the case. Humans will always judge, but the people judging are also on a quest to live their best lives now and so should you. Make yourself a priority and do everything you can to leave behind the greatest legacy you can.
Get Your Own Personal Power Posse
Have you ever noticed that really happy, successful people have a group of other amazing people surrounding them? I’d call this a power posse because they are the people in your life who empower you to do great things.
I guess you could call them your empowerment posse as well.
Often times we fear being judged by other people because we step into things alone. When you surround yourself with a positive, support group, you’re able to gain the encouragement you need to stand in the face of (even severe) criticism.
Sometimes when negative comments are directed at us we start believing the lies. That’s why you need your own personal power posse to hold that mirror of truth so you can see yourself as you truly are and not as others say you are.
Your power posse will also be there to cheer you on before an event and give you constructive criticism with a dash of love to help you continuously learn, adapt and grow.
Over the years I’ve created my own power posse and when things get tough or judgement rears its ugly head, they are always there to help me continuously put one foot in front of the other.
Be Happy With Who You Are Right Now
This might sound like a weird thing to say to someone who’s struggling with a fear of being judged. But there is a solid truth to it.
Earlier I spoke about the fact that one of the reasons I was so overwhelmed by other people’s opinions was because I was judging myself just as harshly. That means I wasn’t happy with who I was at that time and thought there were tons I need to change.
Being highly uncomfortable with yourself and where you are in life makes it much easier for other people’s opinions to affect you. If all you can see when you look in the mirror are imperfections then that makes it easier for other people to point them out to you.
When you open your mouth to pitch to someone, if all you can hear are mistakes, they will sense that as well. Stop making it so easy for others to judge you by first being happy with yourself as you are right now, flaws and all.
Once I learned to accept m flaws and imperfections it made other people’s opinions voids because I loved me and that’s all that mattered.
Love yourself now and love yourself hard, and you’ll be surprised that just because others don’t get you or may put you down, doesn’t mean that you will see yourself as they do.
Fear Of Being Judged Is Normal
It’s perfectly normal to be afraid of what other people might think of you because as human beings we want to be liked and we want to be appreciated by the people around us. Even though you can’t control the fact that other people will judge and criticise you no matter what, you can control how you react to those judgements.
Instead of focusing on all the things people say or could be saying about you, focus on becoming the best version of yourself. No matter what others might say to try to suffocate your success or limit you, you don’t have to believe it.
Be bold in pursuing what sets your soul on fire, let your voice be heard and shine a bright as you can no matter what may come your way. No matter how you feel you have the power to control your fear and it’s time to unleash that power.
Ready to overcome your fear of being judged by others so you can share your business with the people around you? Get my FREE Self Confidence Guide below and join all the amazing women who are building confidence every day and becoming unstoppable in their BIZ!
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